My Way or the Highway

You know the one about the guy in the flood? He's at his home when the rescue workers come, and he tells them "Don't worry about it. My prayer will save me."

"Really, because we have a truck right here."

"Nope, this is between me and God."

"Okey dokey!"

Guess what? Despite his prayers, the flood waters rise. He's living on the second floor when some evacuees row up to his window in a boat.

"Hey buddy, need a lift?"

"Don't worry about me! God will save me!"

"Really, because we have this boat you know..."

"I told you. I'm going to pray, and God will save me."

"Okey dokey!"

Finally, this man is living on the roof when a rescue chopper makes it's last pass!

"Hey buddy! Grab the ladder! We're almost out of fuel!"

"Go on without me!"

"Just shut up and grab the ladder!"

"No way! I'm waiting for God to save me!"

'Okey dokey!"

When he drowns and winds up in heaven, he storms right up to St. Peter.

"Where were you guys? I prayed for God to save me!"

"Where were we?!? We even sent a fricking helicopter for your ass!!!"

Sifu Marcus gets all the credit for telling this story to me. Point is, I'm sure that guy on the roof told himself many times that it's different strokes for different folks, you know? In the end, demanding that things happen your way isn't going to get you anywhere. Who cares, so long as they happen?

Seriously, guys! Shut up and grab the ladder!